Knowing that it doesn't have to be a long drawn-out session is a lovely grown-up fact. On the way home in the car, her husband mumbled, " Six months without sex is a long time. Patients are always relieved to find out there's a reason they're not as into sex. But don't give up too easily. Just like you will sleep again and you will go out with friends again and even be up for giving birth again, you will want to have sex again. Grab the monitor and head down the hall for a steamy shower scene, or initiate a round of Seven Minutes in Heaven.
The next time you're in the mood for sex, try downloading a white-noise app on your smartphone. That may seem hard to believe, given, well, everything you've just read, but as a mother myself, I know it to be true. Estrogen levels drop right after giving birth and remain low while breastfeeding. You will want it again. You'll solve two problems at once: My mom came to visit last week, and when she took the boys out for a walk, my husband and I promptly got busy, just like the good old days! Not surprisingly, they weren't getting along too well. And she had a C-section. You thought your roommate was sound asleep when you and your partner decided to heat it up under the covers. My anxiety was not unique, of course. One friend referred to her first time postbaby as a blowtorch going where the sun don't shine. Quickies are your new best friend. If you're breastfeeding, even mother nature is working against you. Lack of sleep, a changing dynamic between you and your partner, and perhaps some body image issues as you realize that belly ain't gonna flatten itself: In other words, don't let your mind drift to what time the baby ate last, or whether you wrote a thank you note to your Aunt Kathy for the sleep sack she sent. Just like you will sleep again and you will go out with friends again and even be up for giving birth again, you will want to have sex again. The fact is, you won't have as much time to linger over dinner or go out for elaborate dates, so sex can be the thing to remind you that you're on the same team—and still more than just Mom and Dad. Childbirth can also shift our internal parts into just the right place, to make them more sensitive to stimulation. It's a good way to turn a tricky situation into a turn-on," suggests Kristen Chase, author of The Mominatrix's Guide to Sex. Knowing that it doesn't have to be a long drawn-out session is a lovely grown-up fact. Also, let's be honest, it puts everyone in a better mood. Some couples find it difficult to get comfortable with the idea of having sex with a baby in earshot, even if she's not sharing your bedroom. And it's not by your college roomie -- it's by your own baby. The sound of crickets chirping can be your secret code for "meet me in the guest room. Grab the monitor and head down the hall for a steamy shower scene, or initiate a round of Seven Minutes in Heaven. Here's how to make post-baby sex the best sex of your life.
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